Unicorn Blood
by lehhhgoo
Summary: GleeKinkMeme fill: Brittany has a bit of a lube obsession, Santana's gets dragged along for the ride.


**Disclaimer**: I do not own Glee. Sucks, right?

**Prompt**: From the Gleekinkmeme. Prompt: Brittany has a bit of a massage oil/lube fetish. It started with just massage oils. She really liked the feel and scents of them which benefited Santana greatly because she got loads of massages any time Brittany would buy a new oil. The obsession grows to encompass lubes though. She's obsessed with the different types and flavors. She finds some really interesting flavors like tiramisu and whipped cream. She finds ones with cooling effects and ones with warming effects, ones meant to make people climax longer, ones meant to make people last longer, she straps on a dildo to test ones with "g-spot simulation," she's tested a crazy amount of them meant to make sex more "intense." Sometimes, Santana just really wants to have some normal, naturally-lubricated sex, but she's kind of whipped so anytime Brittany finds a new one she wants to test, Santana just sits back for the ride, even if it leaves her lady bits with a weird tingling sensation for hours after.

**Rating**: NC-17

* * *

"It's called '_Unicorn Blood_'Britts," Santana emphasizes, hoping the ridiculousness of the name would make Brittany reconsider.

"It says "no unicorns were harmed in the making of the product,"' Brittany reads, flipping the small tube in her hands. "Come on. Unicorn Blood is a known aphrodisiac, Santana, hence the name," she pouts and Santana absolutely melts. "Don't you want to try it?"

Santana really doesn't. She just wants Brittany to put her tongue on her or her fingers inside her. She just wants to cum and call it a day, but Brittany just bought this new lube and she knows that Brittany won't stop until she's tried it.

It's becoming an obsession.

It started off innocent enough. Brittany loves things that smell good; she also loves things that are silky, so when she picked up that apricot massage oil on a whim, it was love at first smell/feel. Santana kind of loved it too though because every so often, Brittany would bound into her room with palpable excitement and tell her to take her shirt off and Santana, who is naturally a tense person, would find herself surrounded by exotic, fruity scents as Brittany's wonderful hands would press and smooth the knots and kinks out of her neck and back. That was great while it lasted but then one day, Brittany stalked into her room with that mischievous glint in her eyes and told her to take her skirt off instead and there's been no going back since.

Granted, it hasn't been all bad. That one _Lick Her _lube had made her just the right amount of sensitive that every brush against her clit made her whole body hum with arousal and when Brittany had finally drawn her hot tongue flat up her slit, she shuddered hard into an orgasm so forceful she's sure she blacked out for a couple of seconds. There was also that strawberries and cream flavored lube that hadn't really made her feel any different but Brittany enjoyed the taste of it so much that she emphatically licked and sucked her to three orgasms and Santana had to plead and squirm her way out of a fourth. Then there was that _Discover G-Spot_ lube that Santana had been super unsure of when Brittany presented it to her. It wasn't like Britt needed any help discovering _anything _inside her which was apparent by the way she twisted and curled her fingers inside her while applying the clear, velvety lube. It did something though, because when Brittany finally slid the head of the strap-on dildo into her, she saw stars. It was like nerve-endings she didn't even know were inside her came to life and the dildo rubbed against each and every one of them, pulling this intensifying warmth out of her and butting it right back in until that heat just burned and unfurled throughout her and she was shuddering through an orgasm under Brittany's subtle strength. _That_ was probably one of her favorites.

She really wishes they were all that good though. Some have been absolute nightmares. Like that _Nibble Nipples _one that one time. It was actually pretty good while they were using it though. It made her nipples tingle with a pleasurable warmth and the mere presence of lube seemed to intensify Britt's boob fetish tenfold which was all good until the next morning when her nipples felt so raw that even her bra hurt to put on. She spent the whole day wincing every time she moved because the material would drag against her sensitive nipples and when everyone kept asking her what was wrong, she had to make up some bullshit Cheerios injury. She vowed never to do that one again. Although, that wasn't even half as bad as _Ultra Orgasm _which promised to strengthen orgasms and by strengthen orgasms it meant stave one off until the lube wore off. Santana had never been more frustrated in her life; it seemingly pushed her to the edge so many times, embers of an orgasm flaring through her and retreating into small shocks of pleasure until she was so desperate for her elusive climax that she fucking humped Britt's face like a savage and still nothing. Poor Britt was a trooper through that debacle though, she wouldn't stop trying for two whole hours, using her mouth and when her jaw got tired, her fingers, until Santana finally clenched beneath her. The whole experience had aggravated Santana so much that she hardly even enjoyed the orgasm when it came. That was also put on the list of never-again(s). Still, nothing was worse than the _Like a Virgin _lube. Now, Santana appreciates a Madonna namesake as much as the next girl, but when Brittany presented the tube, she hadn't taken the name so literally. Apparently, that was a mistake. Of course, since she's pretty sure they haven't created a cream yet to restore the coverage of her hymen, this cream pretty much just engorged her inner walls so that when Brittany went to slip the dildo inside her, there wasn't that usually pleasant sting of being filled; nope, it definitely felt like her first time again and she was completely unprepared for that uncomfortable, pretty damn painful, stretching sensation that tore through her. And since they didn't exactly skimp on the size of the strap-on they had bought together, it felt like being ploughed into by an 18-wheeler, no matter how slow Brittany went. That discomfort was one aspect of losing her virginity that Santana never wanted to recreate and she'd even dare to say that the discomfort that lube created was worse. She put a ban on that lube immediately, making sure to watch as Brittany threw it in the garbage. She even told herself that she was absolutely going to veto the next lube Britt brought into her bedroom, but Brittany had given her the sad eyes, like she's giving her now, and it hadn't taken even a minute for her to give in, like she's going to do now.

She sighs.

"What does this one do, Britt?"

Brittany flips the bottle, squinting her eyes to read the small print.

"Intensifies pleasure, increases sensitivity, and sends you blissfully to the brink and beyond," Brittany uses such a weird exaggerated accent to read it that Santana can't help the little smile that forces its way onto her lips.

"Fine," Santana gives in; Brittany gives an excited yelp. "This better be good,"

Santana's already naked from Brittany's new method of work her up and then break out the new lube. Brittany is sneaky like that; she knows there is a far less chance of Santana saying no to her if she's turned on and she uses that fact to her advantage.

She watches, propped up on her forearms, as Brittany squeezes a few drops of the sticky liquid onto two fingers. It's a wispy silvery color with little specks of what Santana is sure is glitter and she has to roll her eyes because down there is probably the last place she was any glitter.

Brittany dabs a droplet on her outstretched tongue, licking back into her mouth and snapping her lips a couple of times. She scrunches her nose cutely, running her tongue across her lips.

"Minty," she assesses, turning her attention back to Santana. "You ready?"

"Mhmm," Santana agrees, watching intently as Brittany parts her outer lips with lube coated fingers. "Oh," she husks, surprised, her thighs trembling into the new feeling. It's cold, but not like ice cold. It's an intensifying coolness, like not freezing on impact but the sensation seems seems to spread against her, making her tingle. Brittany spreads the lube generously, massaging the slippery wetness into flushed folds. Santana falls back against the bed, no longer intent in watching to make sure this lube isn't going to make her spontaneously combust or something. It feels pretty fucking good so far. The cool tingling makes her feel like she's buzzing and Brittany's fingers provide a contrasting warmth against her, like holding her fingers at a comfortable distance from a flame during a harsh winter.

Brittany singles out her clit and gives a few deliberate strokes. Santana gasps.

"Feel good?" Brittany asks teasingly, catching her clit between her two fingers and giving a tiny tug; Santana's whole body lurches.

"So good," she moans, inhaling a steadying breath even though she kind of likes the heady dissemblance Brittany's fingers are causing inside her. She really does feel like she's tingling all over.

"Good," Brittany presses a series of butterfly kisses against her hipbone, fingers sliding easily against Santana's slick flesh. "Time for the real test then,"

The loss of Brittany's fingers against her is probably among the greatest of tragedies but Santana hears the shuffle of movement and the soft click of a bottle cap being snapped open and if what's coming next is anywhere near as good as the pleasant chills still making her body intermittently tremor in pleasure then she's happy to wait patiently for Britt's plan to develop.

She doesn't have to wait long.

Just the very tip of a lube covered finger slides into her and she loses all the air in her lungs on her stunned exhale. She clenches around the intruding digit trying to draw Brittany and that contradicting coolness further into her but Brittany doesn't budge. She's content to work the lube in slowly, tracing an imaginary circle into all the cushiony flesh her fingertip can reach.

She slips in further, spreading the cold tingling inside her. It's working in degrees kind of like someone blowing cold air right into her. It's cold on impact and the biting chilliness laps at her insides the further Britt dips her finger in. She's already buzzing with the sensation on the outside, so sensitive that even the crisp room air is providing a tinge of pleasure as she arches to get Brittany deeper inside her.

Brittany reaches the hilt, pressing up hard with her finger like she's hollowing her out.

"Oh God, Britt," Santana can't help herself; she writhes against the digit, bucking her hips so Britt's finger slides against the spot inside her that makes her shudder. It's a bit of a different sensation than usual. Usually, she's so warm already and Brittany just keeps heating her more, building her ache like blocks until it's too high to keep standing and she shatters. She's aching that badly already though so each stroke of Brittany's finger is knocking some of her blocks down, reducing her to orgasm instead of building her up to it. She needs more. "Britt!" Later, she'll denying whining like this but right now she doesn't care if she sounds like a puppy whimpering for a belly rub. "Fuck me, please baby,"

It makes an absolutely lewd kind of sucking sound when Brittany slips out of her and when she thrusts back in, it's with two fingers and she curls into Santana's core with practiced expertise. She's rubbing inside her, slipping almost all the way out, thrusting in and pressing up until dizzying flyaway specks clout Santana's vision even behind tightly closed eyelids.

Her clit is still throbbing, buzzing with the breezy cool sensation. She slides her own hand down her body, lightly pressing against the swollen nub with her middle finger. She moans, pressing up into her hand and Brittany's. A few light circles on her clit and she'll climax, she can feel straining through her muscles but Brittany uses her free hand to tug her hand away from her body. She presses the back of her hand into the mattress forcefully, intertwining their fingers to prevent escape.

"Britt-Britt!" Santana whines, teeth clenched against her desperation; she wants to cum so bad.

She can feel Brittany's smirk against her skin as the blonde leans down to softly kiss down the neat band of downy hair leading to her center. She hovers over her, breath ghosting warm across the cold tingles. Santana's back arches off the mattress.

"Do it again," she husks, breathless. Her free hand quickly tangles into blonde hair, trying to keep Brittany where she needs her most.

Brittany's clearly done with teasing though. She blows a more deliberate stream of breath across Santana's exposed center, hovering so close to her clit that Santana can almost feel her lips. And then she feels her tongue, strong, warm and wet, lick firm from where her fingers disappear inside her up to her swollen clit. Santana squeezes at the hand intertwined in hers, hips thrusting into the divine pressure and Brittany does it again, lapping with broad strokes across her center.

She's mumbling her encouragement, gasping and moaning as Brittany's fingers and tongue send these shocks of pleasure through her. She's tingling so badly and she wants nothing more than to press more of Brittany's warmth against her.

Like Brittany can read her thoughts—or her body—she opens her mouth against her, drawing her numbingly cool clit into the wet warmth of her mouth. Santana lets out a breathy, shuddering sigh, her whole body arching into the wonderful sensation. She shudders, collapsing back into the comfort of the mattress as her inner walls clench hard around the breadth of Britt's fingers.

Brittany calms her body with soft, intermittent thrusts and soft, playful licks until she finally slips out of her and makes her way up her body with teasing bites and kisses.

Santana's still tingling, eyes unseeingly fixed on the ceiling when Brittany tugs her earlobe between her teeth, sucking gently to ease the sting. Her heart feels like it has dropped all the way to her center and between her thighs can't stop thrumming with these pleasant little tingly aftershocks. Brittany's palm splaying on her stomach is enough for her body to lurch again and her breath to hitch.

Needless to say, it was a pretty fucking fantastic orgasm.

Brittany seems amused by her post-orgasmic cathartic state.

"So, does this one go in the good drawer?" she asks teasingly. There's an old metal filing cabinet in the back of Santana's closet that she stole from dad's office when they were renovating and bringing in all new and better furniture. Ever since she put it in there, the unlikelihood that her mom would ever go in there lent it as the storage place for anything they might need to hide from their parents. It's where they keep the strap-on and anything else they've used and stored away to be possibly used again which of course includes an assortment of lubes that they've deemed worthy enough of reuse. The second drawer is the "bad" drawer where they keep the stuff they'll probably never use again but have kept as a reminder of them at least trying it. A good assortment of lubes are in the drawer as well.

"Definitely the good drawer," Santana murmurs, suddenly sleepy.

"Sweet,"

She can feel Brittany detangling from her and she can hear the sound of movement as her closet door is pulled open and the filing cabinet drawer after that.

Brittany's voice floats to her in her sleepy lull.

"That's good because the company that makes it were having a 50% off deal," she hears Brittany murmurs excitedly. "I got _Pixie Blood_ and _Nymph Milk_ as well,"

"Can't wait," Santana mumbles. The last thing she feels before she drifts off to sleep is Brittany wrapping around her.

**Review please. I'll probably be posting a couple more kink meme fills in the next couple of days! **


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